5 Steps to Cope With Your Anxiety

As you probably know by now if you have been reading my posts, that I have anxiety. I also struggle with OCD and PTSD. I have not been formally diagnosed with any of these conditions, however I have been seeing a Psychotherapist who believes that I posses the attributes of these three conditions. I think I've always been an anxious person, even as a child so I think I have struggled with anxiety for a long time, I just didn't know what it was. The OCD is something I think fostered a little later in life, maybe in my teen years. It's a mild OCD that is associated with my anxiety. For example, I used to walk to my part-time job and every time I left the house I would lock the front door and when I would be about half way to my work I would panic that I didn't lock the door (even though I knew I did) and would have to walk all the way back to unlock and re-lock the door. It was something I had to do no matter how hard I fought the urge not to. The PTSD was brought on from my parents accident. For those of you that read that post you can image the flashbacks and trauma I struggle with after witnessing such a terrible thing. Now what's important to understand is that although I deal with anxiety, OCD and PTSD, does not mean I don't have a normal life and it also does not define me. Since I have been dealing with anxiety for quite some time I have come up with a list of 5 steps to help cope with anxiety that seems to help me and therefore I wanted to share these steps so that other's may also benefit from it. These steps are nothing special or ground breaking, it's all basic and simple things that anyone can do. I find that following these 5 steps help me get back to a positive headspace to continue on with my day.

1. Breathing exercise/positive thinking
In the first step I like to take deep breaths in through my nose (you really want to fill up your lungs), hold it 5 seconds and then release through my mouth (really pushing all that air out). I like to do this 5 times. It is important during this time not to get distracted, try not to think about anything, focus on the breathing in, holding and releasing, I like to close my eyes as well in order to really focus. Once I complete this I like to bring my mind to positive thoughts. Whether you think of a moment that is special to you, or thinking about a special person or of something you wish you could be doing (like relaxing on a beach lol) whatever helps you calm yourself. In some instances I do what my therapist calls gratitude thinking. Depending what made you anxious, sometimes it's essential to remind yourself about the things you are grateful to have in your life. When I think about my parents accident I get very upset. I begin thinking, should we have been somewhere else that day, should we have stayed on the ship, should we have stayed at the check point etc. And then my mind goes into overdrive and I get overwhelmed. The point is my parents are alive and I sometimes forget that because the flashbacks of the accident are so traumatizing that it overpowers everything else. So in this instance I would say to myself, I am grateful for my family, I'm grateful that they are alive, I'm grateful they were able to come back home, I'm grateful that one day we can go on another trip. I also have a mantra (a saying) to help me get passed the feelings, I also do this when I'm about to do something that I know will cause me anxiety. For example, I fear driving and so every time I get behind the wheel I say this a few times before starting to drive, "Feel the fear and do it anyway." You can create your own mantra or find one online that best suits you. When I have already experienced the anxiety I like to use the mantra, "This too shall pass". I find that saying all these things out loud really help me from being extremely overwhelmed from the thoughts brewing inside my head. 


2. Take 5 minutes to allow the feelings
In the second step I like to take 5 minutes to then allow the feelings to come out. It's okay to be scared, worried, anxious, sad etc, as long as you take steps to get out of that headspace or mentality. I like to talk to myself out loud to explain why I'm feeling the way I am. For example, I recently applied to a college that I must register with once I completed the ECE program. The registration fee was quite expensive and on top of that I don't like using my credit card online. A week went by, the money was taken out of my account but I hadn't heard from the college regarding my status. Long story short I began to panic as I was worried that something was wrong and started crying. I did the breathing exercises which helped calm me down, I then started thinking about positive things and then I begin to reason with myself. "They took the money out of your account because they are processing your application. If you are worried that something is wrong contact them and ask for the status of your application." Sometimes you just need to explain to yourself that thing's are going to be okay and that there is always a solution to your problem. Our minds often jump to worst case sanrio or worse conclusions then it actually is.

3. Understand whats bringing up the anxiety
In this third step you should already be able to figure out what caused the anxiety. It's important to understand what caused the anxiety and how it made you feel. That way if this happens again you know how to recognize it and take the steps to ground yourself. You then want to acknowledge the feeling(s) and let it go.

4. Do something to distract you/calm you down
In this fourth step you can do almost anything you want, this is the time to occupy yourself with something you enjoy that will also help relax you and your mind. For example, I like to bake, read, take a bath, watch tv, exercise etc. You know yourself well so find something that will distract you and occupy your time. If you are at work or busy in the middle of something and don't really have the time to do one of these things, then I would suggest to just do some light stretching and shake off any lingering thoughts. 

      

5. Talk to someone, journal the experience or both!
When you have time I suggest talking to someone you trust about the experience if you feel comfortable to do so. If you don't then I suggest journaling the experience as another outlet. I like to do both because I find the more I talk about my anxiety the easier it is to cope with. I believe it's important to find someone you feel comfortable talking to, whether it's a parent, sibling, friend etc. because if you keep these emotions and thoughts to yourself, it will bottle up inside you, it will grow and that can lead to a panic attack. Now panic attacks are very scary, I've only experienced three in my life and each time it was terrifying. So I urge you to prevent having one and therefore following each of these steps. I hope that this information is helpful and that you are able to take charge of your anxiety. Remember anxiety doesn't define you, it doesn't have to control your life and you can cope with it using these steps. 

Deanna

Comments