Although what seems to be a spectacular few months, also had its challenges. I developed a very intense pain under my right rib which brought me to the hospital. It ended up not being anything other then baby boy growing and expanding and my body just figuring out how to fit it all. Thankfully that pain has mostly subsided. Then I started to develop serious acid reflux to the point it would wake me up at night. It felt like my throat and chest was on fire and it made me extremely nauseous. Again thankfully that has gotten better. 2 days before my shower I developed this sever lower back pain which has made it difficult for me to stand, walk and lye down. Unfortunately this is a newer symptom and I have yet to get any relief.
Other then these annoying and painful symptoms, all seemed to be going well. Baby is kicking, I'm gaining weight so that must mean he is getting bigger lol ! I went to see my OB as part of my regular routine check ups and she wanted me to get an ultrasound done to see the position of the baby and to also get his measurement. I haven’t had an ultrasound since my 20 weeks scan and when I finally got in to get the scan done I was 32 weeks so I was really looking forward to seeing him. The tech was able to show me his face and body and she seemed to not really show any concerns (usually I can tell when something is off). So I left that appointment feeling pretty confident. 2 days later my OB's office called me saying that there were some concerns found on the ultrasound and that my OB wanted me to start doing weekly ultrasounds to monitor the baby. Now this is not news you want to hear so close to the end of your pregnancy. Immediately I started to panic. "Is the baby ok?" "What does this mean?" Unfortunately the nurse was not able to provide me much details other then they wanted to repeat the doppler study and re-check measurements. The nurse could tell I was spiralling and she tried to reassure me by saying "If this was an emergency I would be telling you to go to the hospital, so don't jump to any conclusions until you speak to the Doctor." I was in tears for the remainder of the day, just thinking to myself what if something is wrong. The OB hasn't seem my baby in 12 weeks, what if something developed after all that time and we never knew.
The week later I went in for the follow up ultrasound, it's crazy how just a week prior I was sitting in the exact bed seeing my son and feeling so happy and relieved and then the week later feeling scared and fearful. The tech was able to show me all his body parts and we even caught him kicking in real time. I left the clinic just praying to God that everything was going to be ok. He seemed like a healthy baby I could see him on the screen moving around so that had to be a good sign. The following week I went in again for my next ultrasound and the tech says "Oh wow you've already been here 2 times and have a bunch more appointments coming up." Which I replied, "Ya I have no idea what's going on I haven't had a chance to speak with my OB so here I am". Again another really nice tech who showed me him on the screen and we caught him sticking his tongue out and yawning. We couldn't help but laugh.
The following day I went in to see my OB for the first time since getting the results from the first scan. The first thing I asked her as soon as she sat down was "So what was the reason for the weekly ultrasounds and what is going on." She told me that on the first scan they noticed something abnormal in the flow of an artery and they noticed that his head was measuring larger than the rest of his body. Sitting there confused I said "What does that mean?" which she replied back saying "The other two ultrasounds came back normal, although his head is slightly bigger than the rest of his body, he is fine and no need to worry." She also advised me that I do not need to do weekly ultrasounds anymore and that I can do one more ultrasound the week before he is due.
It feels like in this pregnancy I have had so many "scares" which thankfully have all resulted in nothing. But it doesn't change the fact that mentally, emotionally and physically I have gone through so much. I'm not going to sit here and say I had a difficult pregnancy, because every step of the way me and my son have been healthy. All the further testing or repeat scans have all been precautionary and I greatly appreciate having an OB who is very thorough. I think the only issue I've had is not being able to get straight up answers right away which caused me to spiral and panic before I even knew what for. And I don't think that's the OB's fault but that's how our medical system works. As a first time mom, I just wish I had a little bit more reassurance and better bedside manner when it came to me and my baby's care. It's frightening going through a pregnancy, let alone for the first time. Everything is new, you don't know what's normal, what's not. It can be very overwhelming and I feel like if our healthcare system could treat us a little bit more like people rather then numbers then I think many more women could have a more positive experience.
4 more weeks to go and we'll finally get to meet this little guy who has already been keeping me on my toes. I know that all this pain and all this fear will be so worth it when I get to hold him in my arms and look into his eyes. Sending good vibes and prayers your way my little hunny. Until we meet...
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